Stem Cell Transplant… the Musical
by Chris Harper
Music by lots of folks
Cast: Our Gang of 1965, with Chris Harper, far left
I noticed that when running,
I have to keep on stopping
what it is I can’t conceive
That takes my breath away
I found you under my skin,
This lump near my ribs
Is deep in the heart of me
And I am sure
It not really a part of me,
I found you under my skin.
Sometimes you notice that its – hard to breathe,
And running – makes you heave,
But I’m afraid it’s gonna stay that way,
Once you were all clear,
But now it would appear,
This thing inside you is going to deride you,
cos my boy you have tainted blood .
What you thought was halitosis is Myelofibrosis, and that is not good news,
I can confirm my diagnosis as your marrow shows fibrosis , at level four.
I am afraid it is a gotcha as all we can do is watch ya, there is nothing else.
Some say an option is a transplant but my view is that you can’t, cos it ain’t proved.
All this talk of getting cured,
by treatment, jabs and pills
We’ve a long way to go, before we know
we can even cure these ills,
Cos the drugs don’t work
They just make you worse
So we’ll just give you blood again.
Can we fix it, yes we can –
Claire the builder, Can we fix it,
Claire the builder, yes we can –
I’ll send you to Kirsty
Kim, Amelia too
Doctors and nurses
Will help to fix you
Hey there, we got something for you,
It’s a transplant, that is what we will do
Yes a transplant it could be a cure
But there’s one thing you will notice
You’re gonna have strange DNA, Yes you’re gonna get strange DNA
You might now like to shop
and dance til you drop
but you won’t reverse park a car!
But there, is a thing you might see
It is something we call GVHD
It must happen, because you will see
That you’ll need it to get better
So you’re gonna get GVHD, Yes you’re gonna get GVHD
You might feel the hots or develop some spots
It can come out in so many ways.
Hunt For A Match
Many years ago
Your Mum and Dad
They had some great fun
Three kids they did have
Well we’ve tested their blood
And tissue too
And here’s the result
That is coming to you.
We know your Sisters are not a tissue match
It’s gonna be a MUD* transplant,
This adds a small catch
But we know it will work
If we find the right batch
* (MUD=Matched Unrelated Donor.)
Finding A Donor
We have searched just everywhere,
To find a match that you can share
Anthony Nolan came up trumps
So you should not be in the dumps
Ten-ten we got a match,
ten-ten there is a catch
ten-ten a plot we’ll hatch
ten-ten, you’re getting girlie cells
There a lady who’s good and she donates her blood
And she’s offering her cells for a transplant.
She’s a good match for you so do you want to go through
With the process of a stem cell transplant
Ooh, ooh, she’s providing a delay to heaven
Stairway To heaven – Led Zeppelin
We got some antibodies, that come from a pet,
They will kill your immune system, on that we will bet.
You are going to feel, so very ill
But at least the NHS, is paying the bill.
You’ll be in isolation
You’ll be a bit of a pest.
Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit.
Rabbit,Rabbit. Chas & Dave
I won’t thank you for the daaaaaaaaaays – of headaches,
thirst, sore throats, diarrhoea and nausea
But I will always saaaaaaaaaay you did all you could,
to help me through because ya,
Helped me with fluids and the pills
As they just vanquished all my ills
Post Cell Infusion
Hi ho hi ho its off to work we go, we’ll stop the moans , reline those bones Hi ho hi ho Hi ho
Hi ho hi ho This marrow is not so, it should be sponge but it is grunge. We’ll have to work and make it so.
Watching The Numbers
Who knows what tomorrow brings in a world where 3 from 5 get cured
All I know, are my results
And I feel
That I am quite alive
The road is long
There are transfusions on the way
And we reduce tablets every day
Blood levels up where they belong, haemoglobin flying, you’re no longer dying.
Blood levels will reduce your ills and without a scene will reduce your spleen
Impact On Spleen
I had a lump and I did not want it,
A marrow transplant should help to gone it,
You got much bigger with me feeling nothing
Something that you do
And your presence stopped me being physical
You took a little then you took me over
You set your mark on stealing my life away
Growing steadily, it was all about you
I’m really witnessing a spleen reduction,
it vanished quickly like removed by suction.
I wanna get you back under my ribs so you can watch me ski again
We’re from Woman cry my cells,
We’re resisting manly smells,
As we set about replacing all your marrow.
But I am still a man
So please do the best you can
And clean the bones so they work really well.
Oh, Yes, it now works and its healing born of pain.
It has been hard work but look what I can gain.
I am strong,
I am much fitter now,
Saved by women!
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